Sunday, 28 August 2011

Who am I and who am I not

I am a very determined, mostly stubborn, highly cultured woman that loves herself. It happens that I am a woman that loves others as well. Not only other people, but other things. Like books, many books, sunsets, rock, crystals, plants, my planet. For my planet I do what I can. I pick up my rubbish and occasionally other people’s rubbish, I recycle, I use green energy… Not nearly enough, but it is what I can do right now.

I am a mother. a single mother of two girls and as such I go through all the joy and desperation of parenting. I love my children. I respect my children. I would jump in fire for them without a second thought. But while they came of me, they don’t belong to me, but to themselves…

I am a daughter and a sister… In that area I don’t do much other then existing. If  I could, I would do fancy dinners at home, coffees and lots of chats. Probably I would also help where possible. As it happens, I live on the other side of the planet from my parents and siblings so I don’t do much.
Occasionally, when the mood strikes me, I am a lover. Not very often but as I don’t have enough time to dedicate to relationships, since I have so many other interests that keep my busy. I am independent, highly capable of looking after myself therefore I am not needy for relationships. I only do it for pleasure.

I am a friend. I can only hope that a good one, but that remains for my friends to decide.

Sometimes, as my children so carefully and half embarrassed point out, I am weird. I think that in a broad sense that means that I don’t conform to the norms.  I dance barefoot in the worst rains, I wear summer dresses in winter if the mood strikes, I wear hand painted hippy clothes one day, business clothes the next and maybe next to noting another day… I’m allergic to my own hair, I cry if I break a nail, I laugh when I’m sad and cry when I’m happy, I state my opinions regardless if everyone else thinks differently. Also, I am totally able to do crazy things that make no sense to anyone but me.

I am a witch… By that I don’t mean that my wardrobe is only composed of black clothes that belonged few centuries back or that my favorite way of spending my time is burning in fire, even though I do love a good open fire next to which I can relax. However, my element is Earth and as such I could spend a life time gazing at the mountains. By being a witch I mean that I think that with the power of my thoughts I can change my reality. I also mean that sometimes I weave a spell, other times I meditate, always respect All life, including the one I eat and occasionally heal others. For me, it means as well, that all gods are equally as good, even though I relate to Goddesses more.

I am a photographer. By that I mean that I love taking photographs even when I am paid to do it. Also, I create clothes. I make them, paint them… Both are ways of expressing myself that have the added benefit on sometimes being paid for it.

I am not greedy. I totally understand the value of money and utterly enjoy spending them, but I don’t see them as important in the big scheme of things.

I am addicted to coffee. I could drink up to ten coffees a day and then have a perfectly peaceful sleep.

I am a dreamer. I dream of  world in which no one will die of starvation, wars, or religion and our children will have an unpolluted planet to live on.

What am I not? I’m not a follower. I make my own decisions and trends.

I am not patient person, especially with ignorance. If I can read and expand my horizons, everyone can do it. No excuses accepted. If one is ignorant, with me are only two options: either inform oneself or shut up. Black and white. I don’t have an issue with anyone that say’s I don’t know. I only have an issue with not knowing and still talking about the subject. For example, I have no idea about physics. Not only that I have no idea, but I have no interest in it whatsoever. So if I am in a group that talks physics, I listen, but I don’t express opinions as I don’t know enough to have an opinion.

I am not intolerant. By that I mean that there are things I am highly intolerant of, like child abuse and domestic violence, and very tolerant with other things, like other people’s religions as long as they don’t try to convert me.

I am not stupid. As a matter of fact I have a very high IQ and I do my best to use more then 10% of my brain. While I do understand that not everyone has a high IQ, I don’t understand why other people refuse to use more then 10% of their brain, such as it is.

I am not a man. That means that I am a woman and hence I think and I feel like one.

And I care nothing about what other people think of me. I love and respect myself too much to allow other people opinions about me to drag me down.

I am not humble. More so, I see no point in being one. However, while I am arrogant, I am smart enough to listen to other people and be able to change my opinions if there are good enough reasons to do so.

Because I have no need for people to like me, I tend to be mostly honest.

No comments:

Post a Comment