Believes

Lately I find myself more and more in the position of explaining my believes... And it is hard... How can one explain the knowing of the soul and all those little things that are beyond the words... How can one explain the Divine in letters... How can one explain that which has no label?

It is easy for me to explain what I am not... But being not leaves me with the necessity of putting into human words what I am...

I believe in more then one god, which I prefer to call a Goddess, and yet I am not a polytheist. Because for me, all gods and One God, all goddesses One Goddess and God and Goddess One thing that has no word. So maybe I just believe in The One that is All and yet everything. The One that is me and the rock, my child and the river, my friend and the skies, my enemy and yet the air, and fire, and wind...

I am in the same time a slave and a master, as there are no boundaries... I am the daughter, and yet I am the rivers and the oceans, the light and the dark, the Moon and the stars, the dawn and the dusk... I am the daughter and yet I am the trees that bend in the wind and the wind itself, the springs that start high and the mountains themselves, the Sun and the fire from the beginning of time... I am Me, and yet I am One with everything from the beginning of nothing until the end of All... Because I am All and All is Me, in a circle with no beginning and no end...

I believe in this God that I call a Goddess as giver of life, that is All and yet nothing... Wisdom and pain, blessing and curse, life and death... Maybe my All is the life then ends in death just to be reborn again as Life...

I believe in magic and the Witch as the old wisdom that is so easily lost in a battle for power. Being the All and yet nothing at all, I believe that I can shape my reality... Being just energy I can bend the energy according to my will. And yet while I have complete freedom, to do the good or bad that might be the good that is bad and the bad that is good, I can harm none without having to pay the price of tying myself down into someone else reality...

And yet I believe in those things I see and I feel... The Moon that has the power over my body and my planet... The planet as Earth and giver of life, hence as the Mother... I believe in spring as the Virgin, in summer as the Mother, in autumn as the Crone and winter as Ianus the god that looks one side to the past in death and the other to the future in life... I believe in Yin and Yang as The One that is neither male nor female, neither good nor bad...

How can the All be anything but neither good nor bad since the rain has the power of life and blessing but also of death and curse in floods... When the sun, the very same sun can make my plants grow and yet starve to death another? How can I believe into pure good and pure bad when I have the power to happiness and pain, mine and another?

And more, how can I reject the dark when only out of dark light can come to life? How can I reject the part of me and of All that suffers and lies broken only to find the magic of raising again, wiser then before? How can I only love the light when it would not exist without the dark to show it off? How can I believe only in good when I owe my wisdom to the dark times that nearly broke me?

And like the All that I call god, how can I not believe in that which most call magic? How can I not when from myself I can heal another? How can I not when wishes upon the stars that die come true? And yet, magic like the All is neither good, nor bad... It just Is...

I believe that life is fallowed by death fallowed by rebirth... and how can I not when my plants that die with winter get new leaves in spring, the same plant and yet another? How can I not when the sun raises and goes away each dawn and each dusk? How can I not when every winter is fallowed by another spring?

How can i not believe in the All as Goddess as Virgin, Mother and Crone when the one cycle of the seasons is so? How can I not when I, myself went from the carefree virgin to the powerful mother and going soon to what I hope will be the old wise woman? How can I not believe in the All as both male and female when life exists not without both?

I don't know what label to put on my believes. Pagan and Wiccan are the closest I have, but I can put no labels on That that has no label...